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Am I wrong for being suspicious my GF is lying to me and with another guy?
This past Sunday evening, my GF said she was meeting a “girlfriend” for drinks at the Penthouse, a swank bar at the top of a luxury hotel in Santa Monica called the Huntley. She doesn’t have much money and is unemployed so I thought it a bid odd for girlfriends to meet there as this place is known for charging $12-$15 for drinks and for being a bit of a meatmarket or a place you bring a date.

After a couple of hours or so I called her to see when she was coming home as we live together. She didn’t answer her phone. I called the hotel and was transferred to the bartender. I asked if she saw my GF and described her and said she would be with another girl or two not thinking she might be with a guy. After looking around she said she didn’t see her. My GF called me a few minutes later from the ladies bathroom even though I could hear the bartender from the bar. I asked when she was coming home and she said she would be leaving in about half an hour.

I have been with my GF for about 18 months now. In all this time she has never introduced me to any of her friends and she never answers my calls but always calls me from the ladies room. Also, on at three other occasions, she has said she was out with a girlfriend when I later learned she was actually with a guy. Two of those occasions she was with her ex and on one of those occasions she slept with him.

So yes, I was getting suspicious. When she said she would be coming home in half an hour or so I said I would meet her there. After all, I wasn’t doing anything anyway and I was curious to meet her friend. She said “ok.”

I was at the Penthouse 12 minutes later. I looked everywhere but she was nowhere to be found! I called her phone repeatedly and she didn’t answer. Then after another five minutes she answered. I asked where she was. She said she was driving home! I was like, how could you leave and so fast! Especially when I said I was on my way! After all, they would have to finish their drinks, request the check, give a credit card then sign and leave a tip. She played it off, saying she thought I was joking. I hadn’t been joking even remotely.

So, she now says I’m being crazy. That I was in the wrong and crazy for coming to, as she puts it, “check up” on her. I think something isn’t right here and that she is hiding something from me. Why would someone say they will be there half an or so and then just 12 minutes later be already out of there? Especially when their BF said he was on his way to meet her there?

Am I being played for a fool here? What should I do?

Hello, I’m just a mother in dire need of any advice anyone could give me, I’ve thought about everything and I can’t find a solution.

Well to get to my question. My son is 32 years old and he has always been a bit rebellious, he never wanted to do his schoolwork, he never had friends until middle school and when he did they were the wrong type of friends, like the type of people that smoke (including pot) have long hair, drink, skip school, wear black clothing, and when this happened I thought it was just a phase, which it was, but the wrong type of friends remained, I just don’t know why, but throughout high school Jake just did not do his school work did not study and just kept partying, showing up drunk at home, smoking pot, bringing girls home and actually sleeping with them in our home, that we didn’t know what to do, we just kept hoping it was a phase until he dropped out of high school when he was 20 (yes he was still in high school at 20 he practically left because they told him that at 21 he was getting kicked out and he was still in 10th grade).

Ok so jumping a few years ahead, he lived with us at the time, and lived in a lot of luxury, my husband and I have quite a bit of money and we always gave him everything, but my husband is different minded than me, he was very poor when he grew up so when my son started acting like this he wanted to kick him out, but I prevented him from doing it, it was all so hard for me especially since about 10 years earlier my other son died in a skateboarding accident and Jake was now my only son and the worst part was that at the time Jake was dating this woman that I really hated and she ended up overdosing on heroin, while my son was in the room. This really devastated him and he started drinking heavily after this.

So, anyway about 3 years ago, after years of enduring Jake’s drinking “incidents” and him just leeching of us without getting a job, it started to get worse, there were incidents everyday, the police were called and he was just ruining our lives, so during one of the incidents, I told him something horrible, to this day I can’t believe that as a mother I said this to my son, but I told him that I wished it had been him that died. When I said this, he just looked at me started crying and left the house, I thought he would be back the next day as always but he wasn’t, a few days later a moving truck came for his stuff and he called me and told me that he wasn’t ever coming back and we got what we wanted.

I started getting really worried and depressed so I hired this woman who used to work for my husband that had a military background to try to keep an eye on him without intervening, I thought it would be temporary, but Jake never came back, the woman I hired (without even telling my husband) just kept telling me that he was on the streets for a few days and then he rented an apartment, but a few months later he got kicked out of there for not being able to pay rent and I tried reaching out to him getting him to come back and he didn’t.

Anyway for the past year he has lived with this woman that he knew in high school and her husband, it is so sad to see him like that, having other people support him. Additionally, the woman I hired told me that he is drinking all day and walking around by himself at night drunk with a liquor bottle and crying. She even took pictures and they made me feel so depressed, now I have a drinking problem, I want him to come back and live with us, but he won’t even take my calls and now I hate my husband because when I told him about it he said he was much happier without Jake.

The reason I’m asking this question now is that about 2 weeks ago my son almost died, had it not been for the woman I hired to keep an eye on him he would have died. So what happened was that he was on his usual drunken night walks and he went into the forest, now I’ve always told the woman I hired to never let him see her no matter what but just follow him, but during his walk in the woods she said he started vomiting and passed out, so after waiting a while she carried him back to her car and took him to the hospital. He had alcohol poisoning! he almost died! he’s back with his friends now but I’m so worried that he’ll die one of these days!

How can I help him or get through to him? I just want him to move back in with us! Now this is hurting me! I’m drinking almost as much as I assume he drinks everyday!

Please give me some advice, I beg you.

By the way- if this is too long for you or you want to make fun of me don’t bother answering.

Hello, I’m just a mother in dire need of any advice anyone could give me, I’ve thought about everything and I can’t find a solution.

Well to get to my question. My son is 32 years old and he has always been a bit rebellious, he never wanted to do his schoolwork, he never had friends until middle school and when he did they were the wrong type of friends, like the type of people that smoke (including pot) have long hair, drink, skip school, wear black clothing, and when this happened I thought it was just a phase, which it was, but the wrong type of friends remained, I just don’t know why, but throughout high school Jake just did not do his school work did not study and just kept partying, showing up drunk at home, smoking pot, bringing girls home and actually sleeping with them in our home, that we didn’t know what to do, we just kept hoping it was a phase until he dropped out of high school when he was 20 (yes he was still in high school at 20 he practically left because they told him that at 21 he was getting kicked out and he was still in 10th grade).

Ok so jumping a few years ahead, he lived with us at the time, and lived in a lot of luxury, my husband and I have quite a bit of money and we always gave him everything, but my husband is different minded than me, he was very poor when he grew up so when my son started acting like this he wanted to kick him out, but I prevented him from doing it, it was all so hard for me especially since about 10 years earlier my other son died in a skateboarding accident and Jake was now my only son and the worst part was that at the time Jake was dating this woman that I really hated and she ended up overdosing on heroin, while my son was in the room. This really devastated him and he started drinking heavily after this.

So, anyway about 3 years ago, after years of enduring Jake’s drinking “incidents” and him just leeching of us without getting a job, it started to get worse, there were incidents everyday, the police were called and he was just ruining our lives, so during one of the incidents, I told him something horrible, to this day I can’t believe that as a mother I said this to my son, but I told him that I wished it had been him that died. When I said this, he just looked at me started crying and left the house, I thought he would be back the next day as always but he wasn’t, a few days later a moving truck came for his stuff and he called me and told me that he wasn’t ever coming back and we got what we wanted.

I started getting really worried and depressed so I hired this woman who used to work for my husband that had a military background to try to keep an eye on him without intervening, I thought it would be temporary, but Jake never came back, the woman I hired (without even telling my husband) just kept telling me that he was on the streets for a few days and then he rented an apartment, but a few months later he got kicked out of there for not being able to pay rent and I tried reaching out to him getting him to come back and he didn’t.

Anyway for the past year he has lived with this woman that he knew in high school and her husband, it is so sad to see him like that, having other people support him. Additionally, the woman I hired told me that he is drinking all day and walking around by himself at night drunk with a liquor bottle and crying. She even took pictures and they made me feel so depressed, now I have a drinking problem, I want him to come back and live with us, but he won’t even take my calls and now I hate my husband because when I told him about it he said he was much happier without Jake.

The reason I’m asking this question now is that about 2 weeks ago my son almost died, had it not been for the woman I hired to keep an eye on him he would have died. So what happened was that he was on his usual drunken night walks and he went into the forest, now I’ve always told the woman I hired to never let him see her no matter what but just follow him, but during his walk in the woods she said he started vomiting and passed out, so after waiting a while she carried him back to her car and took him to the hospital. He had alcohol poisoning! he almost died! he’s back with his friends now but I’m so worried that he’ll die one of these days!

How can I help him or get through to him? I just want him to move back in with us! Now this is hurting me! I’m drinking almost as much as I assume he drinks everyday!

Please give me some advice, I beg you.

By the way- if this is too long for you or you want to make fun of me don’t bother answering.
that1guy- I know what I said was horrible, I can’t even begin to understand how he felt, I picture it in my mind everyday, during his drunken incidents, he was always annoyingly cheerful, but the moment I said that he just looked at me in such a way that I thought my heart was going to stop, and then he just left. I think about it everyday and I hate myself for saying that to him

My dad is owed a lot of money from someone who says they can’t/won’t pay him back but we just found out they have put there luxury home on the market. Can he put a caveat on it so when he takes this to court he can get paid the money he lent them from the profit of the sale of the house.
****Australian residents only please****
Yes he does have proof he lent them the money, they just don’t know it.

My friend started seeing this guy awhile now, but she thinks he is a player & unsure about moving on with him. Her suspicions stem from his frequent clubbing, out of town trips, and flriting. She wants to run a lil test on him b4 throwing in the towel since he IS a good catch on paper…good job, luxury car, his own home. I added him on facebook (since he does not know me) and he sent a amessage asking how he know me…..Im not sure how to reply.

Hello, I’m just a mother in dire need of any advice anyone could give me, I’ve thought about everything and I can’t find a solution.

Well to get to my question. My son is 32 years old and he has always been a bit rebellious, he never wanted to do his schoolwork, he never had friends until middle school and when he did they were the wrong type of friends, like the type of people that smoke (including pot) have long hair, drink, skip school, wear black clothing, and when this happened I thought it was just a phase, which it was, but the wrong type of friends remained, I just don’t know why, but throughout high school Jake just did not do his school work did not study and just kept partying, showing up drunk at home, smoking pot, bringing girls home and actually sleeping with them in our home, that we didn’t know what to do, we just kept hoping it was a phase until he dropped out of high school when he was 20 (yes he was still in high school at 20 he practically left because they told him that at 21 he was getting kicked out and he was still in 10th grade).

Ok so jumping a few years ahead, he lived with us at the time, and lived in a lot of luxury, my husband and I have quite a bit of money and we always gave him everything, but my husband is different minded than me, he was very poor when he grew up so when my son started acting like this he wanted to kick him out, but I prevented him from doing it, it was all so hard for me especially since about 10 years earlier my other son died in a skateboarding accident and Jake was now my only son and the worst part was that at the time Jake was dating this woman that I really hated and she ended up overdosing on heroin, while my son was in the room. This really devastated him and he started drinking heavily after this.

So, anyway about 3 years ago, after years of enduring Jake’s drinking “incidents” and him just leeching of us without getting a job, it started to get worse, there were incidents everyday, the police were called and he was just ruining our lives, so during one of the incidents, I told him something horrible, to this day I can’t believe that as a mother I said this to my son, but I told him that I wished it had been him that died. When I said this, he just looked at me started crying and left the house, I thought he would be back the next day as always but he wasn’t, a few days later a moving truck came for his stuff and he called me and told me that he wasn’t ever coming back and we got what we wanted.

I started getting really worried and depressed so I hired this woman who used to work for my husband that had a military background to try to keep an eye on him without intervening, I thought it would be temporary, but Jake never came back, the woman I hired (without even telling my husband) just kept telling me that he was on the streets for a few days and then he rented an apartment, but a few months later he got kicked out of there for not being able to pay rent and I tried reaching out to him getting him to come back and he didn’t.

Anyway for the past year he has lived with this woman that he knew in high school and her husband, it is so sad to see him like that, having other people support him. Additionally, the woman I hired told me that he is drinking all day and walking around by himself at night drunk with a liquor bottle and crying. She even took pictures and they made me feel so depressed, now I have a drinking problem, I want him to come back and live with us, but he won’t even take my calls and now I hate my husband because when I told him about it he said he was much happier without Jake.

The reason I’m asking this question now is that about 2 weeks ago my son almost died, had it not been for the woman I hired to keep an eye on him he would have died. So what happened was that he was on his usual drunken night walks and he went into the forest, now I’ve always told the woman I hired to never let him see her no matter what but just follow him, but during his walk in the woods she said he started vomiting and passed out, so after waiting a while she carried him back to her car and took him to the hospital. He had alcohol poisoning! he almost died! he’s back with his friends now but I’m so worried that he’ll die one of these days!

How can I help him or get through to him? I just want him to move back in with us! Now this is hurting me! I’m drinking almost as much as I assume he drinks everyday!

Please give me some advice, I beg you.

By the way- if this is too long for you or you want to make fun of me don’t bother answering.

The nature of the encroachment upon American constitution is such, as to grow every day more and more encroaching. Like a cancer; it eats faster and faster every hour. The revenue creates pensioners, and the pensioners urge for more revenue. The people grow less steady, spirited and virtuous, the seekers more numerous and more corrupt, and every day increases the circles of their dependents and expectants, until virtue, integrity, public spirit, simplicity and frugality become the objects of ridicule and scorn, and vanity, luxury, foppery, selfishness, meanness, and downright venality swallow up the whole of society.

Please omit your silly comments about home-schooling
http://quotes.liberty-tree.ca/quotes.nsf/quotes_author!ReadForm&Start=21&Count=20&RestrictToCategory=john+adams

I care about absolutely NOTHING at all. i just wanna be home and do nothing. i don’t take care of my self…i hate meeting people…..i sleep when ever i can in school. i don’t do homework, projects, study, pay attention. i have no feelings towards other people. i could care less if my best friends or their parents die. i dont have many feelings except anger. its hard to fake my emotions and fit in anymore so i just avoid everyone and listen to music. i dont want many luxuries. i just want music and movies. i do not want to go to college at all. i want to have a shitty job and come home to a simple life when i get older. help.

My little half brother is14. I’m 33 years old. His father was 83 and my mom was 37. My mom had him when I was 16. After they both died 6 years ago I was the only family to take him. My wife and I have no children of our own and we’re still unbelievably heartbroken about that. My wife and i work full time jobs but she does the lions share of the responsibility with him. All of his school stuff, dr’s stuff and parenting stuff she takes care of.

I started to hate him and his dad when I was around 17. It was like my mom didn’t even care about me anymore. All she cared about was her husband who treated her like crap and my little brother. My brother’s dad hated me. When i was in high school this man tortured me every chance he got including beating the snot out of me. My mom spoiled my little brother all the time and let him act like a total brat. She gave him all the attention and pretty much ignored me and treated me like i wasn’t even her son. I left home when i was 20 and was pretty much estranged from my mom and her family when i got married. I never communicated with them, but when they died my little brother had no other family but me. I mean this man hated me and now i have to raise his child?

Now my wife and I are Raising him but before he moved in with us I really didn’t spend any time around him. He has( MR, EPILEPSY and CHIARI MALFORMATION, LENNOX GESTAULT SYNDROME, ADHD - and I’m finding it really difficult to cope with his extremely horrible grades, Lying, bad behavior,and destroying everything in our home and not caring about anything and he has no remorse for doing so, leaving nasty things around the house, he has Impulsive behavior, he’s always lying and stealing and he constantly disrespects us both. Sending him away is not an option because we have no other family members.

My Wife and I don’t Spank ,or hit,or yell but we talk to him and take away electronics like his laptop and I-pod. I love my brother but at the same time i hate him because raising him is 24-7 because of his medical needs. I feel like i’ve begun neglecting my wife because we are so focused on him. My brother has put a strain on my life. i feel horrible because the stress of raising a special needs child has been taking a toll on us. I feel bad because he didn’t ask to be here. We have no friends so i can’t call anyone to help us out when we need a little break. Just unsure what to do, advice?

Please no nasty posts i need advice. be Kind Please.

Hi,
Please read through the complete post before offering me advice. I have a very strange situation where i am seeking help not because i really care for a person but am under a impression that, that very person would kill herself and blame me or my entire family.
We are a family of 5 including two brothers and a sister and our parents. My sister was sent to her grandma for upbringing due to some unavoidable reasons after 2-3 years of her birth. She had good education and a good material life. While growing up she never could accept the fact that we were her family and instead treated my grandparents as her family and fostering parents. She was kinda detached completely from my parents and us and had a very neutral attitude. My mother has always been attentive to her through all the years right from visiting her to attending to her small needs.
When she went to college she left her grandparents and never returned home for a period of 3 years atleast. Meanwhile my granddad died and she didnt care to return home at that point. I used to think she had a great liking for him but am not sure about it now. When she returned home after 3 years when we were vacationing she was full of crap to vomit. She directly abused parents and told my brother to be more responsible. LOL! My brother didnt owe her any fuckin thing. In literal terms she had become a bitch whom i hate to talk to!
All the pain had to be borne by my mom and i could often see her crying till the time we left. I have heard that she would threaten my family for more money to lead a lavish life. We do send her good amount of money to support her living but she has graduated and can get a job to support herself easily. But she refuses to do so and expects us to send her money to lead a life of luxury.
She once sent me a mail telling me how special i am in her life and later on ended up knowing that she would do all this to extract some money from me. This is the extent of cheapness a blood relation of yours can fall too. The bitch has a lot of boyfriends and i know she is a complete Psychotic Bitch. She plays with words inside the family and thinks her to be smart by using people.

Now, I dont speak to her anymore neither my bro. She stopped talking with Dad lately and mom’s the only person speaking to her these days. After studying her behavior for years i have concluded that this bitch is fighting a critical medical condition and needs a Councillor asap. I will never go up and offer her help coz i know she will throw it back on me real bad. I believe she may kill herself and blame all of us for all this but i really know she was never deprived of love actually from anyone.

She is a direct threat to me n my family and i need to figure out how to handle this situation. I’m posting this not coz i care for her but because she is a threat to us. Please don’t post lectures blaming us for negligence or any such thing as i know this bitch cares for none and she would have been the same had she lived with us.
@Beverly, Rachel, Miranda: Thanks for understanding our situation. I believe we are done with handling this situation. My mother has tried to handle the situation to best of her capabilities by pouring love, money and everything she could with no help. She would refuse to go to a Councillor for sure and this would light a new fire which i want to ignore.
After Beverly’s advice i’m seriously considering on consulting with my attorney but this feels like grave as my heart is not ready to accept the fact that i’ve to seek help from law to straighten up things in the family. I’ve asked my mother to end communication with her several times but she just can’t do that and continues to send money for her life. She literally cuts mom apart and spends money on luxuries. I mean how can one abuse her parents and take money and enjoy with the same.
My mother being a very conservative women wont approve of moving to law but i really need to do something about this. The only link