I went to the doctor the other day to find out that I had severe anxiety,and depressive issues. Along with sleep apnea.. so I was told to see a psychiatrist. The reason I’m having all these issues is because I live with a mother that is bipolar, and a father with anger issues. I get no help when trying to keep up with school ( I missed 2 weeks because I had a reaction from starting birth control pills) and the doctor said it would take at least 10 days for me to fully recover. My mother is usually the only one home, and she is no help at all. I do all my homework on my own, as usual, and asked her if she could turn them in to the school earlier so the school can send me the rest of my homework. She started yelling at me saying “I have to constantly take you here and there to a doctor and a psychiatrist and NOW you want me to go and get your homework!?” I told her to please stop yelling, because I had a head ache. And she called me rude for it, threw my homework on the floor, and spit on it. Stupid things like that happen, and its really starting to take a toll on me.
Its always a constant fight in my house, I lost my little brother, and I have been having the weirdest spirit-related dreams. Usually my dreams are spirits who ask for help, and if I don’t “help” them, they threaten me. I tried to ignore these dreams of spirits trying to contact me, but its just getting worse and worse. Now I have hallucinations of a man sitting at the edge of my bed. He looks like he could be middle aged..maybe 30-40’s. He had a weird blue aura outlined around him..and he’s always facing the wall making hand movements and making gestures as if he is talking to someone. Those are only one, out of many other experiences I had. I always tell myself that they aren’t real, because if I think they were real, it would only scare me more. Another thing is, whenever I’m at an airport or a place with lots of people, and noises, I start to get really anxious and my heart starts to beat fast. Then my hands start to tremble a bit and all my mind focuses on is the people moving around me and the noises I’m hearing. Sometimes it gets me really sick to my stomach and I start to have the urge to gag or throw up. At times my vision is a huge blur or I can’t see anything at all..and only hear all the noises around me. It makes me really nervous, and I don’t know why. I think all of the things I’ve been through in my life has caused me to be this depressed and anxieted . What could I do to make my life any easier? Everything is just making me feel worthless and a huge fail at life. Considering that I have C’s and F’s in school. I used to be an A student, I don’t know what I’m going to do anymore.

Any help is appreciated.
Sorry for the long details

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